Three Dog Night song the Hixican Jew put in my head a long time ago. Very eerie vibe to it. That's how I feel today. (Justin Timberlake song that also feels appropriate today)
Woke up and went to work for another two hour adrenaline rush at work today. Sometimes I am amazed at my boys and my interactions with them. They're great. That same boy I mentioned yesterday was dropping so many quotes I can't remember them all. But I was in stitches on the hall. And I went to work it was windy and cloudy and dark. But when I left it was noticeably warmer and definitely sunny.
It's kind of how I feel about life. My living situation is getting kind of complicated. Banana's sister pulled out of their father's plan to get them a house so now that's up in the air. It seemed so sure but I guess I should know by now that nothing is sure. I'm praying something works out.
And that's something I realized. I haven't been praying as much. I feel like I've been skating by. But on my walk home from work today I realized all this. The living thing. The LSAT thing. The bill thing. The job thing. I feel like I am close to my breaking point. But I also feel appreciative that I have noticed that I might be close to it and that's really important. Before I probably would have broke and then shut down. At least I'm recognizing it now. The vacation and my sojourn to Michigan are in back to back weeks and I couldn't have asked for better timing. And even before I realized that I haven't been praying as much, something about the sunshine and the gentle breeze had me very optimistic, like my heart knew that things would work out.
And all things work for the good. That's Romans children. 8:28 if you must be precise.
Life is like how I felt last night. There's tension. It's uncomfortable but it's not exactly bad either. And I know that the metaphorical equivalent of Banana's massage will come make it all better and I can sleep well in perpetuity.
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