Oh today. Cloudy outside. I just woke up blah even before I realized it was cloudy. My head was just not itself. It even rejected hip-hop. I just threw on some Halleglory playlist and sorted through ever more laundry in preparation for my upcoming move.
The laundry I was sorting was stuff that was in the apartment after the fire, so I was bombarded with smoke smells as I ripped open each bag. I kept knocking over my law school recruitment correspondence which contributed to my mood because it made me remember how much I had to do.
Somehow in the midst of being so maudlin I probably accomplished the most I have in a really long while. First up I was actually up before 9. I actually did laundry. And I actually followed through on a thought to go see a professor I've been meaning to see for two months even when she was excessively busy. I didn't run away.
And you know what? The Lord had to be guiding me the whole time. I don't know why he put it in my heart to make sure I saw her. But I just laid out everything. It was an explosion. And beautifully she offered the reassurance I needed and not what I didn't. I am so grateful for her existence and her interest and just continual bothering of me. I'm sad I never took advantage of it before and have taken it for granted for this long. No more. I gotta step my game up.
Sadly in the interim, I was rude to Luna. I really regret that. I always never liked that about myself. I think I like being by myself so much cause I hate to think that my emotions can influence the emotions of others and I don't want the responsibility of being responsible. Such is life.
Today is my last shift of overtime for some time. I promise.
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