As there is nothing to do in the twin outposts of Lancaster and Clinton, one gets so bored that you get fascinated with the change of marquees on the signage of our fine dining establishments. It's so sad that you can actually get excited about fast food specials that you normally, and intelligently, would overlook. Knowing that Charmin is on sale is an oddly comforting distraction in Middle of Nowhere, MA.
Sometimes these semi-rural cats take it too far. Before I delve deeper I must get one important point on paper. Massachusetts sports fans are some of the most fanatic on the planet. In the world sports fan championships, Bay Staters should be the American representatives against the soccer hooligans of Europe. It's even stranger coming from bandwagon central, also known as New York City. Our football teams are in New Jersey, our baseball teams tend to price out tickets for the normal working folk, and it's more of a celebration when you get Knicks tickets than actually being there. I think its more fun to read about sports in the city then actually participate in activer spectating.
Anyway back to the marquee. The location of the offense was our KFC/Taco Bell 2-in-1 extravaganza. And so on Thursday before their eventual AFC Championship game win the signage read: "Patriots Eat Chicken....Be A Patriot". Uhhhh...what?!?!??! Are you kidding me? The fact that someone even thought to put that up pushes a button in me that I can't even explain.
I mean I enjoyed the Red Sox winning cause I hate the Yankees. And the Patriots are just like them, they play like a team. Nobody shines too bright. Just a cohesive unit , the way sports is supposed to be played, ideally. Other than their ritual smackdown of the New York Jets, I don't mind them at all. Stuff like that dumb marquee makes me want to root against them though. And then I can have all the chicken for myself. All of it.
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