Requiem For A Pic

Mira was the first to notice. A few months ago amidst one of the regular lulls in our conversation, she began to poke at my grey patch. She thought my hair was thinning; I assumed she was just trying to provoke me.

But after my next haircut, I started to see it. Fully subscribing to denial, I shelved that knowledge away. That is until about a wek ago. As one of my boys was deciding to be a disruption, he took the time to pause from his climb up a door to notice my situation. "You're going bald you know?" Perfectly stated as he was perched on the handle of the door with a pretty good view of the affected area. In the moment, I even made fun of it, just trying to get the kid off the door.

That night was a whole other story. I patted the front part of my head trying to gauge density and lushness. I'd go back and forth telling myself it was all my imagination or my follicles were completely doomed. With a broad range of inensity, the practice has repeated ever since. Every image of male hair that I have come across has been scrutinized, especially the different patterns that my head might be adapting.And then I thought of all my male cousins on my mom's side and I realized they all had various grades of baldness. And my mom's dad has a bit of the loss too.

Now I have accepted it. My soft curls will disappear eventually. Soon my haircuts will be exclusively low. Eventually I won;t need them at all. When I think of it, its not the worst thing in the world. But damn my vanity still screams "This sucks!" Just as I found a barber that felt like my own and a shop where I felt comfrotable, I also finally decided upon a style I like. Now my trips to the shop will be shorter and less and less frequent.

I will miss it though. We've had good times. There were the mishaps like shsaves too low and hairlines too far bacl. But we had fun too. Dreadlocks were a joyride, initially reckless when the first set didn't take. I will also really miss my grey spot whchhonestly seems like one of the first battlegrounds I'll lose.

I wish it wasn't happening so early. I would have liked to have had at least a more stable career and developing a nice middle age paunch before my hair decided to recede. It also would have been nice to be in a committed relationship with a woman who remembered me with a nice flowing mane and could playfully chide me on its disappearance.Now I consider all the options my appearance might take since I still need to attract that lady, who may chide me on the way to that long lasting relationship.

Such is life. I plan on enjoying my lustrous days for however long they last. hopefully it is long enough for someone to fall in love with me, on the inside.

Update - 12/20/07 09:56: Okay so I just got a haircut and I guess the reports of retreat might have ben grossly exaggerated. it is leaving though. Just not as quick as I first thought