It's A Beautiful Day

....in the neighborhood. Or at least it was.

I nitially planned on writing this after I came back from my run. But the run bruised my body more than I expected. I was still proud of my shape, round as it might be. But once I walked through the door, my body seemed to respond with relief and released whatever fury it had held back. I felt like I lost five pounds in the shower, just by eliminating the grime that accumulated after running it unexpectedly humid weather. The Gatorade was finished in a matter of seconds.

Today was probably the best day that I have gone running. The sun wasn't too hot. Nothing was off base. At times I felt as if I was starring in my own Nike commercial, proud of my form. Oh but my fellow pedestrians were kind of annoying. This isn't even a big town so I thought people would be more friendly like they are in the town where I went to school. Even though they're racist, they still gave me a smile and a nod. These guys got out the way like I had the plague. Maybe the black guy running so hard, and seemingly with purpose set something off for them. You would think it was a real city.

But as I walked home after purchasing my replenishing liquids, I heard a child over my iPod. As I looked to my left there was a little girl who had spotted me far down the block and was saying hi. I initially was tempted to walk past. No need alarming mom about the random guy walking. But she kept saying it and looking at me. So I waved back and said hi. And she kept saying it. I waved again. And she said it again. This time I smiled and said bye and continued walking. A child shall lead them huh?

And kindness usually comes from the most unexpected places. Though the neighbors across the street are kind of eccentric, they've always been nice. Though aloof at times - like when he has full on conversatios with his bird - he has been considerate and generous. He alerted us to suspicious picture takers, signed for a package when we were all away, and even helped them move in a couch. But I guess lately he's been getting weird and his next door neighbor dropped off some material with Uno after she went snooping. Seems our buddy has some things on his record, most traffic violations and a little theft. His most regular friend is also a sex offender. But both of their crimes were either when they were adolescents or really young adults. If they really wanted to take stuff they could have done it already. And they've been nothing but nice.

So if you're looking for evidence that the human condition isn't completely helpless, I guess we need to look to children and ex-convicts more often

Gun License

Necessary to waste the squawking birds who are waking me up. Things weill perish by my hand if I cannot get back to sleep. That is all.

This Morning

Our top story this morning is the appearance of a stray black dog on the porch this morning. As I was reading my book, I heard my roommate leave for her appoinment with the doctor. After her initial footsteps were gone, I heard some lesser footsteps. I assumed that it was just the particular way the wind was whistling through the trees and returned to my reading. But the glint of something moving caught my eye above the book, and there was a new stranger. He walked the length of the porch and came towards me. He stared me dead on, moved slightly towards me, then turned and went. He then went round the corner and was gone. I was so baffled by the chain of events, I stayed glued to my seat. I tried to resume reading, but needed to rise to make sure what I had viewed was not an illusion. I rose and rushed to see if I could catch at least a glimpse of the dog. Imagine my surprise when I saw nothing!

But he emerged from behind a neighbor's bush and normal breathing returned to my system. As homeostasis returned, my paranoia still did not relent. I thought somehow I viewed it as a sign. Should I get a dog like that? Does a black dog predict something more omnous? Sleep deprivation makes one silly. Maybe divine providence was guiding me along the path in some way.

So as I was talking to Doodlebug, my newest friend six hours away in a country where the young are so mighty they beat Brazil in football matches, I was searching for any symbolism regarding black dogs. Churchill once referred to his own depression as his "black dog." It also was a hit for Led Zeppelin in the early 70s. The Wikipedia article alleges that either the sexually suggestive anthem was titled for a loitering black dog in the studio or might be more of a secretive invocation to a divine being due to its similarities with a novel's name for a club of occult.

Yeah I'm starting to lose interest too, though I was feeling kind of spiritual at that moment. In my second trip to the porch once Doodlebug was kicked out, I viewed my neighbors playing catch in the street. They are in their mid 30s - early 40s yet in the middle of the day, they were in the middle of the street playing catch. While I admire the carefree attitude and playfulness at such an age, their regular dallaince with permanent transience is troubling. If I can somehow stack some paper so I can support my whims and fancies, that would be lovely. But I suppose I will hustle as hard as I have to so my wife and children can everything they need and lead the life I wish to have. If I can't live it for myself, at least I can live it through my family.

Okay I need to write my e-mail. I missed writing on this thing so I dropped something super quick.

Haze

I've written this posting at least seven times in my head today. But the haze is so thick round these parts, I think it has contributed to my apathy all day.

Whereas yesterday was mildly productive, today has been a lesson in slothfulness. I was hoping to continue the same pace so I could get some things done. It's not too much of a loss though. I still did manage to get the last couple loads of laundry in. Many blogs remain unwritten and files are still not where I'd like them to be on my computer. No big deal though.

As I was sitting on the porch, doing what people on porches do, my mind started to wander. I recently read an old blog posting post by this underground soul singer about the change in Catholic doctrine about children and limbo. I guess limbo as defined by the church is being in a state of complete contentedness but never having any communion with God. I started to wonder if I was in limbo, like if I'm having true communion with God. I mean He's been answering prayers left and right, but maybe it's to keep me close enough so that I can make that final dive into Him.

So I'm listening to the iPod and I ask God to speak to me through it. The whole uncertainty of where I'll be in the next couple of months is weighing heavier on me since it is actually June. The chill I once embodied is slowly evolving into panic. Here's the deal I made to God: If the next song was DC Talk = Washington, D.C.; Donnie McClurkin = N.Y.C.; Anyone else = Just wait on me idiot. I tried to get in some late Yolanda action in the brief pause between songs but I couldn't decide on another viable answer. The next selection? Take 6 (Take six months maybe? Weeks? Days?!!?). The song: You Don't Have To Be Afraid. That God has a sense of humor. And an ill sense of timing.

Living as the other half lives today, you know lazy Saturday, watching baseball and doing chores around the house, it's nice. This is the first Saturday I began in Massachusetts in over a month so it's nice not to be hustling and bustling. And I've also learned that I want to live like Run's House one day. And even I could not escape rooting for the bloody Red Sox.

Life's good. And being beautiful is hard work. But worth it.

This Is An Emergency

Days off are great.

It's surprisingly warm outside. Here's the view from the Milk Street Mansion porch. A stray black dog just passed through our backyard. I was too lazy to go get a picture.

I spent like 30 minutes reading Wikipedia articles on SportsCenter anchors. It was interesting enough. Nothing worth mentioning though.

I did do some productive things. My room looks slightly less disaster like. I also made tentative plans to actually physically be in church this Sabbath asopposed to my usual internet visitation. Not much more though. It's nice to be chill not need to worry to much about things.

Peace Out

Return to life as usual.

Lord Don't Let It

Now that the sun is actually giving us natural heat on a regular basis, my neighbors have started to show their faces. The Hispanic family to our left has been working non-stop to make their dwelling as presentable as possible for the prospective buyers they intend to woo.

But across the street lives a man who is believed to have lost his driver's license and lives with his grandmother. This theory is not eliminated when you perceive this individual. Never seen him not in a sweat suit. Usually smoking. Dirty hobo hair grooming tricks.

Anyway, dude just came out of his house with a buddy I've never seen (same middle aged looking white pasty man with too long and greasy hair held down by a painter's cap). They look like extras in Clerks III. Or they might hang out with Napolean Dynamite's uncle. That's not the kicker. Are they not now in the middle of the street with one of those Nerf footballs that whistles when you throw it right? Are they not having the time of their life?

As I amble around the house in idle waiting, I don't ever want to end up like that. So the first step in my feigned production is this blog. The transient lifestyle is not for me

Milk Street Zoo

Yeah I was trying to fulfill some sort of household duty by retrieving our empty trash cans from the middle of the road. But as I stepped out, I was greeted by the barks of some disturbed dog. I looked around to locate, but was unable to determine if I was in serious danger of a rabid mutt. Just as I gave up on worrying if my death was imminent, a fine looking golden retriever just walked up the street like he owned it. Then he was politicking with the stray cat across the street. Another stray moved up the block. Then the barks of the first one set off another one that sounded like it wasn't even coming from our block.

So that's it. I live in a zoo.